How Close Are You To Living The Life That Truly Excites you?
Find Out In Less Than 2 Minutes!
A few years ago a headline caught my attention. A model in NYC jumped out of her apartment to death.
I cannot remember details, however realizing that I recall the story again and again tells me that it definitely triggered some deep emotions. At that time I still read newspapers regularly, probably a few dozen articles a day, and I cannot recall many of them. What’s older than the news anyway - there is not much news in the news …
During that time I didn’t coach much, however I always had many female friends, beautiful women and successful, but nevertheless many of them asked for guidance and advice.
Over time I came to realize that I can read people quite well. But I also learned to use what I ‘read’ carefully and only as a guiding indicator. Not because I fear I could be wrong, rather to enhance self-discovery. There simply is no meaning in telling someone even the most obvious things, e.g. that they are “too thin”, “too fat”, “too young”, “too old” etc. First, who is there to define the “too” and “not too” anyway, and more importantly, if someone doesn’t see that (or better doesn’t feel that way), they won’t believe you - even when you say they are beautiful.
Who am I to remind them of a pain they are not ready to process?
However, over time I also came to realize that some people perfected their mask so well that I could only see their beauty, the shine of their performance. Pain perfectly disguised.
Sure, even untrained or inexperienced people often can see easily if a person isn’t well or is suffering. In many people one can see suffering and pain reflected in their outward expression; how they walk, talk, look etc. [Note: Ironically, I’ve observed that people expressing their suffering openly are the ones, who are least likely to accept help for change.]
But there is a large group of people who actually accepted that they sooner or later need to face their “demons” (let’s call it that way; I actually have another definition here, however this would be distracting). They actively participate in their process of change and growth, are ready to leave - sooner or later - their addiction, their numbness and even their deeply hidden pain and trauma; they are ready to process their story, and ready to own it. Letting it go, step by step.
But then there is a group of people that suddenly commits suicide, without any warning. I'm using this example to make a point - often thanks God it’s less extreme; probably however not less painful.
FREE QUIZ: How Close Are You To Living The Life That Truly Excites You? Find out in less than 2 minutes Check Out Now
FREE QUIZ: How Close Are You To Living The Life That Truly Excites You? Find out in less than 2 minutes
There is this group of people that looks beautiful and fulfilled. Everything seems to be easy in their life, they seem to on top of the game. They have achieved outstanding positions and possessions; the press talks about them, we see them in the magazines, and everything we see seems to be the perfect life most of us are longing for.
I came to the realization that actually quite a high percentage of these people we follow and adore does not only have the same or similar mental, spiritual or physical issues as most of us, but even worse … Whilst for a person like you and me it is embarrassing enough to open deep wounds to a friend, or admit that s/he is seeing a psychoanalyst or therapist, going to NA or AA - for someone in the public eye or on a higher level of career much more seems to be at risk.
Imagine you’ve worked all your life extremely hard to be famous or to be a top CEO, and suddenly you feel it’s time, you feel ready to face your deepest hidden daemon - wouldn't you be afraid to lose your contract, not being hired anymore anywhere? Who could you turn to, speak to, knowing your ‚secret‘ stays a secret? Could you imagine a head of state, a minister or his/her life partner showing up at an AA meeting?
Yes, it’s not only the person in the center of the limelight - the same is valid for the life partner and the kids. Probably even worse - the fear to embarrass oneself is huge enough, but to embarrass your life partner or parent with the possibility of them losing their position or career … could you imagine that kind of double pressure on your heart and soul?
Yes, we are living in times where the press does more or less everything to make things public, the worse the better.
Some of our ‘celebrities’ and other people in the public eye actually should get a life time Academy Award. They publicly perform and convince all of us how fabulous everything is, and we adore them. And nobody can see how strong their pain is, how rotten their marriage, how poisoned their heart and soul. We want them to shine for us, for the hope that one day we might be like them. We want them to live the lie we want to believe in.
But statistics don’t lie, and statistics don’t make a difference of position, profession or possession. Roughly 25 - 30% of them have been sexually abused, molested or suffered a similar severe trauma in their childhood. And about 25 - 30% suffer today from depression, anxiety and addiction. Just a coincidence?
Be professional and make us profit, CEO.
Shine on, glamor girl, shine on.
Cover up, cover girl, cover up the humiliation of your soul.
Be polite, politician's partner, have a drink on us.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Jay currently lives in Cape Town, South Africa. A place he calls home. Jay’s expertise is to support and guide inspired individuals to transition from a profit oriented business career to a purpose driven business career and fulfilled life. He recently started MasterStories.com, a platform on which individuals can share and process their personal story. Most excited however he is about starting The Bridge with his nephew Henri, who currently resides in Prague - two generations, inhabiting completely different parts of the world, coming together for the mutual intention of uplifting three and more generations! - Check out Jay and Henri's FREE QUIZ "How close are you to living the life that truly excites you?"